As much as Sebastian wanted to say he hated shopping, it was one of the few things that made him feel like a regular person (as long as he hid himself well). The mundanity of pushing a little metal cart around and filling it with your silly little groceries was something that brought everyone down to the same level.
Leaning on his cart, slowly meandering forward down the aisle, he looked down at the shopping list Ted forced him to write. It annoyed him a bit, but it helped - and he hated to admit that. Ted had a habit of doing things like that. Forcing tasks on Sebastian that while tedious were things he either needed to get done, or were helpful. And while they had a net positive, that doesn’t mean he enjoyed doing anything Ted told him to do.
Though, he liked Artie. and Artie liked Ted (somehow). And if he wanted to stay on Artie’s good side he should also be nice to Ted, he figured. Which was hard for him to do, since Ted was near impossible for him to understand. And it also felt impossible to live up to Ted’s astronomical standards. He wondered how someone like Artie - so laidback and carefree - ended up with someone as stuck up as Ted. Which was something that sebastian enquired about before he headed to the store.
Artie was very quick to clarify that Ted really did care about him, and his manner of showing it was through directing Sebastian to do chores and other menial tasks - much like, for example, writing a shopping list.
“It’s annoying as shit, though,” he hissed, barely audible. Artie sighed and looked off to the side, sort of acknowledging that yes - it was a little annoying.
“Well… it’s how he shows he cares. doesn’t hurt anyone,” Artie shrugged.
“How do I get him to cut it out? Even for like, a little while?” which, was a very valid question. Artie looked up for a moment in thought, until an idea came to him.
“Show him that you’re capable,” Artie nodded. Sebastian narrowed his eyes for a moment, probing further. “Well when we met, the thing that drew him to me was my piano playing-”
“I can play an instrument though! I play bass, taught myself!” Sebastian huffed.
“I’m classically trained, honey. Ted has a very particular idea of… class and quality which is very, uh… traditional.” Artie danced around words, and Sebastian rolled his eyes.
“Right, well, I’m not trying to change my entire fuckin' lifestyle, so how am I supposed to get him to -” Artie suddenly lit up.
“Oh! you know what he would appreciate? If you learned how to make a good cup of tea. Teddy showed me how to make a good cup of coffee way back when, and when I had it for the first time I never looked back.” he reminisced.
“Coffee is easy,” Seb waved his hand dismissively. Artie raised his eyebrows.
“Sweetheart with the way that Teddy makes coffee… No, actually, I think the both of you would get frustrated. Tea might be easier for everyone involved.” Sebastian sat back and folded his arms.
“You want me to teach you how to make tea?” Ted looked up from the newspaper on the desk.
“Yeah,” Sebastian said. There was a silence between the two of them for a few seconds. (If Ted wore glasses, this would be the point where he takes them off and places them on the table in a somewhat passive-aggressive manner.)
“What did you have in mind?”
“What is the easiest tea-”
“English breakfast. Difficult to mess up and has a very plain flavor profile that would be easily adjustable to the palette of someone like yourself.” They stared at each other, silent for a few moments longer.
“I’m going shopping by the way,” Sebastian announced. Ted gestured to the notepad and pens at the front of the desk, and with a quiet sigh Sebastian picked up one of each.
Which led him here - pacing up and down aisles with radio hits bleating pathetically over the store loudspeakers. He stared at the wall of teas, and then looked back down at his list where Ted specified exactly what he was to buy.
- english breakfast tea - NOT LOOSE
He wondered what “loose” meant and if it mattered that much. Sebastian picked up a box of tea - it was the right flavor and didn’t say it was loose, so he assumed it was fine. He tossed it in the cart, and began heading to the self checkout.
Upon arriving home, Sebastian took out the small box of tea and placed it on the table first. Then started putting everything else in its proper places. Ted materialized in the kitchen doorway, and Sebastian acknowledged him with a glance.
“Whenever you’re ready,” Ted said. Sebastian continued putting away groceries until just the box of tea was out. Neither of them did anything for a bit, just staring at each other. “Are you waiting for my permission or something?” Ted tilted his head. Sebastian shrugged a bit. “Well go on then, get yourself a cup and get the kettle from the cabinet.” as Sebastian did that, Ted simply walked through him and sat in a chair at the kitchen table. Sebastian placed the cup on the counter, then upon retrieving the kettle asked -
“So am I putting the tea in the kettle or -”
“Absolutely not. You don’t want to burn it do you?” Ted asked rhetorically. Sebastian was already getting frustrated with Ted’s attitude.
“If you wanted to pour it out of something with a spout, we’ve got teapots for a reason…” Ted murmured in addition. It didn’t take too long to fill the kettle and put it on the stove to boil - but waiting for it to boil felt like forever. So Sebastian sat down across from Ted, the two of them were silent at first.
“How long do I let the tea sit in the water for?” Sebastian mumbled.
“About four minutes,” he looked to the kettle. “I'll be sure to have you set a timer so you don't let it sit for too long,” Ted said. Sebastian sat back in his chair, also turning to the kettle with a long exhale and a somewhat bitter expression on his face. Ted sat up a bit. “Well, you know what they say, a watched pot never boils - could you get me a book from the shelf please?” Both of them stood up and walked towards the shelf in the office.
“Finished with the news already?” Sebastian asked.
“Yes, nothing of interest happened, really.” Ted stated plainly. “Anyways, I can’t imagine why someone like you would suddenly want to know how to make a decent cup of tea - that is, unless, you’re trying to get on my good side.” Sebastian stayed silent. As they stood in front of the shelf he watched Ted’s eyes scan through the spines. He then paused and pointed out a book, so Sebastian pulled it out.
“The Secret Garden?” he said, flipping it over to read the back, “What’s it about?” Ted watched intently as Sebastian handled the book.
“A young, ill-mannered girl born into a wealthy family,” Ted begins to describe the book as they start walking back to the kitchen.
“After the death of her parents she goes to live with her uncle, and finds the key to the old garden where his wife died,” Ted continues as they both sit down again, Sebastian flipping through the pages to see them marked up in pencil and pen.
“There she meets these two boys - one whom she admires for his understanding of nature and the other a cripple who begins to recover as they spend more time in the garden. the garden is sort of a representation of everyone’s spirits, really, since at the beginning it’s all overgrown and a mess, but by the end it’s all in bloom and everyone’s got a happy ending.” Sebastian places the book on the table and slides it towards Ted, cover up.
“How many times have you read it?” he asked.
“Oh, more times than I can remember,” Ted admitted, gently flipping the book open to the last page he left off on.
“That makes sense,” Sebastian said absentmindedly. Ted immediately looked up from his book, brow furrowed.
“What’s that supposed to mean?” he asked.
“Nah, nothin’. That book just looks like it’s been through hell and back. Besides, you had a smile on your face the whole time you were talking about it,” Sebastian pointed out. Ted’s face relaxed suddenly, averting his eyes from Sebastian. “I never see you do that,” Sebastian felt a grin creep onto his own face. “Are you embarrassed or something?” He asked. Ted didn’t say anything in reply to Sebastian’s taunt. “The main character, she reminds me of someone I know,” Sebastian said. Ted looked up at Sebastian and huffed.
“Should I ask?” Ted pinched his brow.
“An ill-mannered young man born into a wealthy family?” Sebastian leaned toward Ted, smiling mischievously. “Maybe I should read that book too,” Sebastian said, Ted’s hand moving from his brow to cover the lower half of his face. He started bouncing his knee as he looked to the kettle once again, which began at a low whistle.
“You probably wouldn’t enjoy-”
“Who’s to say?” Sebastian interrupted, the kettle slowly getting louder. Ted stayed silent. “You’re smiling, I can see it in your eyes, Ted.” Ted dropped his hand only a little, just to raise it back up again and avert his eyes.
“It’s… I can’t imagine someone like you reading a book like this,” he moved his hand momentarily to gesture to the book. Just as the kettle started to reach it’s loudest point, Sebastian took it off the hot burner and shut it off.
“Just like how you couldn’t imagine why someone like me,” he opened the box of tea and placed a bag in the mug, “would want to learn how to make tea? I’m full of surprises Teddy.” he began pouring the hot water in. Artie poked his head in momentarily.
“Having fun, boys? oh, Sebastian, honey, please pour any leftover water down the sink ASAP! Helps get rid of drain flies,” Artie chirped. Sebastian gave Artie a thumbs up, and he mimicked the gesture. He then glanced down at Ted and gave a warm smile before leaving the two of them once again.
“You are doing this to get on my good side, aren’t you?” Ted asked. “Four minutes, by the way. Set a timer.” Sebastian had the timer in his hands.
“Already ahead of you,” He said. “And how do you know it’s just to get on your good side, hm?” Sebastian said, twisting the dial to the four minute marker.
“Because I know you, Sebastian,” Ted folded his arms.
“And is getting on your good side such a bad thing?” Sebastian leaned with his back against the counter, tilting his head with his gaze fixed on Ted. The two stared at each other, because Ted simply didn’t have an answer.
“Whatever it is you’re doing, I don’t think I’m fond of it.” Ted said.
“But you’re still smiling, Teddy,” Sebastian pointed out. Ted sighed.
“Don’t get used to it,” he said, dropping his smile getting back to his book. Sebastian brought the mug to the table and sat down next to ted once more. The two were silent once again.
“Should I squeeze the teabag to-”
“Absolutely not. you’ll squeeze out a load of tannic acid and make your tea taste terrible,” Ted scoffed. “Have some patience, will you, Sebastian?” Sebastian raised his eyebrows a bit and sat back in his chair. He supposed Ted was back to normal. Looking down at his tea he could see the amber start to swirl and spread into the rest of the beverage. He sort of got lost in it, only being snapped out of it by the timer ringing, causing him to jump a bit. “Take the teabag out now. If it’s too hot wait for it to cool down,” Ted ordered, flipping to the next page.
“Yeah, I don’t feel like burning myself with my piercings today,” Sebastian said, removing the dripping teabag and tossing it in the garbage.
“Watch your tone,” Ted shot back. Sebastian gave ted a confused look that was not acknowledged. So he simply rolled his eyes.
“You sound like my mother,” Sebastian said.
“I’m shocked that you were raised by adults,” Ted replied casually.
“If you were alive I’d hit you,” Sebastian said.
“It takes a lot of self-control for me to not do the same,” Ted replied again. Sebastian glared at Ted, then looked down at the steamy beverage. Giving it a quick blow to cool it off, he took a sip. His face recoiled a little bit.
“Is tea like… an acquired taste thing?” Sebastian asked.
“To some, yes.” Ted answered. He looked up from his book. “Why, do you not like it?”
“I mean,” Sebastian swirled the liquid around. “It’s not the worst thing I’ve put in my mouth.” he tried sipping it again, only to have a similar reaction.
“Well don’t drink it if you don’t like it, just dump it down the sink,” Ted motioned to the sink in question.
“That’s such a waste though,” Sebastian groaned. “Do you want it?” he asked. Ted gave a puzzled look.
“How would I drink it?” he asked, before Sebastian pushed himself in his chair outward, motioning to himself.
“If you wanna borrow me to give it a try, go for it. Besides, you’ll know if I actually did a decent job anyways.” The two of them stared at each other for a moment. Ted got up.
“Well, if you insist,” he said.
In a blink, Ted was seeing the world through Sebastian’s eyes. Feeling Sebastian’s piercings was always something he needed to readjust to when they did this. He felt at his snakebites with his tongue and noted the slight metallic tang they had.
“That would affect the flavor…” he mumbled. “But only a little.” He reached across the table, sliding the book and the mug closer. Picking right back up where he left off, appreciating the feeling of the paper between his fingers. He grabbed the mug with his free hand. The warmth spread through his finger tips. He took a deep breath, and exhaled. Ted was grateful that Sebastian let him do this.
Finally, he got to trying out Sebastian’s tea. He was pleasantly surprised at the flavor. It was nice - not something he generally expected from the likes of Sebastian. So Ted took his sweet time, sipping the tea and reading his book - savoring every moment. Before he knew it, the tea was completely gone.
“Huh,” Ted murmured with Sebastian’s voice. Artie peaked inside the room again.
“Where’s Teddy?” he asked, looking around. Ted raised Sebastian’s hand up.
“Borrowing,” Ted said. Artie nodded.
“How’d it go?” Artie asked.
“Well,” Ted started, placing the mug down on the table. “He can honestly make a decent cup of tea. I drank all of it, actually.” Artie smiled.
“That’s real groovy, honey,” he cooed. Ted marked his place in the book, and set it down.
“He also wants to read The Secret Garden,” Ted told him. “Said the main character reminds him of me,” he looked up at Artie for some kind of confirmation or denial, which he didn’t receive.
“That would be a lovely activity for the two of you, I think!” Artie smiled. “Both of you need more things to get along over and to do together,” Ted sighed.
“If you insist, dear,” Ted exited Sebastian, who popped back into consciousness almost immediately. He stretched out a little.
“So,” Sebastian started. “How was it?” Ted stared at Sebastian with a blank stare. Artie looked at Ted intently.
“It was fine.” Ted admitted.
“Just fine?”
“Yes, it was fine.” Ted reassured. “Please put the book on the desk for me and the mug in the sink when you have a moment,” Ted ordered, before walking away. Sebastian gave a mildly insulted look as both he and Artie watched Ted walk away.
“What the hell, man! I did exactly what he told me to do!” Sebastian hissed.
“Sweetheart, look,” Artie directed him to the mug on the table. Sebastian looked down inside to see it was completely empty.
“Oh…” he said quietly.
“You did a real bang-up job, dear.” he put a hand on Sebastian’s shoulder.
word count: 2,831
characters:
time period: intra-harem
canonicity: canon